Ms Olivia 1-800-601-6975
Do the people who know you, know ALL of you?
Do they know that you’re dressed en femme right now? *nods*
If you say no to those types of questions, then you might want some company on your crossdressing journey. Even if you’re outside of the US, this American Mistress has many affordable ways to satisfy your crossdressing desires. I talk with a lot of crossdressers that lives outside of the US and there is something to talking with a Dominant Woman with an American accent!
pantyboy has been INCREDIBLY gracious to write exactly how he has handled bringing his erotic fetish needs into his marriage.
This is something I’ve talked about on this blog … not just in terms of crossdressing but also other kinks like the need to be a submissive man to a Femdom Mistress.
When you want company, but don’t have that option in your *regular* life, then a relationship with this Experienced Mistress might fill that need!
The Talk with the wife
pantyboy: “Here’s how I discussed with my wife, my desire to wear panties and cross dress.
I first started with the why. I was honest that it part of the reason was that it really turned me on. I also told her that I had the urge to do it, but really couldn’t explain it. To be honest, I still have a hard time explaining the reasons I do it, but I did my best to explain. I also told her there were tons of websites that she could look at that shared info for women who were married or in relationships with cross dressers.
What his wife wants to know about his crossdressing
pantyboy: “Then I kind of went into what I liked to wear etc, because this was the next question she asked. I am mainly a panty wearer and told her this. Which of course led to the obvious, why were you wearing my bra question. I must say I’m not a huge bra fan, but the matching set was the main reason for me wearing it. I also told her that stockings were a huge turn on for me as well.
His wife’s reaction to The Talk about him wearing women’s clothes
pantyboy: “All things considered that first talk went much smoother than I ever anticipated it would. Had I known she would have been so calm about it, I would have told her years ago.
His advice to another married man who wears panties
pantyboy: “I must stress to anyone who wants to tell a signifcant other that you must take it slow. Do not hit them over the head with too much information. That night we set some guidelines. Her clothes were off limits, period. Which I readily agreed to. Even though I still crave wearing certain stuff of hers, I felt that was a fair compromise. Beside that we have no other rules.”
Why he still calls phone sex
Many people do have a real life partner who is understanding or tolerant of a sexual fetish. That is fantastic and sometimes it’s not quite enough. When you want someone who loves your fetish as much as you do, then you might need a Mistress.
Question for you, have you tried to talk to your significant other about your sexual kinks? What happened? Do you prefer to keep that part of you private and yet yearn to share it with someone to understands and also enjoys what you like? How do you handle this?
Ms Olivia
Current Schedule —- How to get a session
Bringing up any fetish with a partner can be a hard thing to do. I’ve mentioned before that I’m lucky to have met/dated etc my wife while in college where pretty much anything can go. We fooled around and it was not thought of as wierd or strange to do some bondage stuff and a little spanking. Lucky for me, my wife is a pretty sharp girl so when there were some spanks delivered she picked up on how a certain part of my body really stood up and took notice.
Years later, after we were married, and going through alternating good and rough patches we had an open honest talk about it. Playful spanking was always there, but I always made it more of a side thing than the main event. I played it down even though she knew it excited me. Sort of saying, “of course I like, but I can take it of leave it, no big deal.
Then as we were coming out of a rough patch I think she came across some things on the computer. Websites I was visiting, or videos I download, I don’t exactly recall. She brought it up to talk about why I looking it, what it was, what I wanted, etc etc.
We had an open honest talk about it. I was embarrassed at first at the being “outed” as a complete spanking fan even though she knew. She was great and asked if I wanted to show it to her, and if that’s what she wanted us to do. The content was very “spanking porn”, roleplaying scenes of spanking punishment and much harder than what we would do. So after several talks and going slow we upped our spanking play and I learned about some of the things she’d like to do more of.
It was occasionally awkward, embarrassing, and scary, but she was great and it moved to arousing, exciting, and well…wow.
As for advice, I would say approach it slow. Small steps starting with talking about “looking for thinking about this turns me on”, and then move from there. Trying to “leave something out” for your partner to find I think would be hard to pull of. If it happens, like for me, you might get lucky. Honest, slow, if they love you and you enjoy it they should be open to it.
I’ve rambled enough…
WONDERFUL comment wellspanked…..and, of course, well said!
I totally agree with you about the *take it slow* but *be honest* approach. I’ve counseled that to varying degrees of success with men and their wife/girlfriend. Of course, it depends on the erotic fantasy or fetish. One thing that men love, but can’t talk their wife/girlfriend into is cuckolding …. I always tell a man, if that is his fantasy fetish then it is probably best left in a fantasy phone sex call and not brought into a real life relationship. But, something like *spanking*? SURE!
I totally admire the consideration you show toward your wife and your courage to speak up about what you do want sexually. I think that level of self knowledge, communication with a partner and willingness to say what needs to be said is rare….and you’re a lucky man (and so is your wife.).
my wife is a man ?!?!?!?
OMG ! Wellspanked, did I say or imply your wife was a man? EEEEEKKKKKKKKK ! I can’t blame spellcheck! I do know that you’re married to a woman!
an innocent mistake, no more than 10 spanks for you for that one…lol
~laughs~ wellspanked……I know it’s possible to hear a *swoon* during a phone sex call. Is it possible to *hear* it when I write it?
Let’s check.
*SWOON*
You’re right ad —- when moving any sex fetish or kinky desire from fantasy phone sex to real life….it’s best to weigh the advantage and disadvantage of various outcomes. One being, of course, that the person whom is your choice for disclosure is turn off, violates your confidence or worse. It’s risky. When it works out, it’s GREAT! But, it’s not a simple thing!
Thank you so much for taking your time to post a comment! 🙂 Hugs and I’m STILL thinking about that sexy lil black number…..*wink* you know, My favorite!