Fetish Questions
Talking to a phone sex Mistress is a great outlet for your questions about sex, sexuality, fetish and kink scenes, general erotic questions. I am well read and have had a LOT of experience with all sorts of sex, sex issues and sexual topics.
I’m VERY generous with my time here on the blog and need to periodically articulate limits, boundaries and what is a session. Take a look at these blog posts: why pay for sex and emotional landmines with free sex.
Fetish questions are answered on this blog
When you call for your phone sex session – we might talk about sex or share an explicit phone sex fantasy – or we might have a conversation about anything in the world. Phone sex is more than sex … it’s about connection and when I’m in a session I give that person my undivided attention. THAT is what you pay for … you pay for my undivided attention and expertise — just like ANY professional. Here is a blog post that details more of what you pay for when you call for phone sex. Here is another blog post that asks the question: why spend your money on phone sex.
FREE answers to your questions
You have a couple options. If you send me a long email with thoughtful questions we will discuss this on a call OR I can excerpt part of your email and answer it on my blog. YES, this helps me create blogs and it is free for you so it’s a win-win situation, don’t you think?
Here’s the email exchange that inspired this blog and my suggestions for this man.
Man:
I just did not think a few answers to some questions constituted a service though. I mean, they are not graphic in nature, I would totally agree if they were graphic. The blog also builds your repertoire of stories and enhances it so I thought that was more for your benefit and there could be more of a discussion about the rest if you were only using a small parts of it in the blog. It is flattering that you liked the thoughts enough to use them, don’t get me wrong.
But of course you do not have to answer me at all though, I am not trying to argue or anything. I am just a little down from the fact that every small interaction costs something, not just the interactions that give sexual gratification.
I suppose you think I am a bit naive because that is just the way it is. I just find it really hard to find any way to explore these fantasies that does not involve paying in some way and its not the money that bothers me because I live comfortably and have a little more than I know what to do with (not an obscene amount more, but a little bit). its just that it makes you feel like you have nothing else to offer except money. So it feels very much the opposite of whatever sexual liberation is.
Would he expect the same from another type of professional – attorney, doctor, financial advisor, etc? Maybe. But, as you can see, it sure rubbed me the wrong way.
My answer: WOW. Okay. I sure do appreciate where you’re coming from.
Now, the reality is that I don’t have unlimited time and energy so I use that resource wisely. This IS my career and I use my time and talents wisely.
I give LOTS of free interaction on the blog and quick comments via email. LOTS.
Extensive personal and private interaction really IS a session simply because I don’t “give it away.’ I understand you’re disappointed but it’s sort of like going into a car dealership, getting the test drive and then getting grumpy because they won’t let you keep the car overnight or for the weekend.
Now, I’m unsure if the blog and my comments there will be ‘enough’ of a gift and that doesn’t feel so good to me.
Feel free to leave blog comments and I will absolutely answer you there.
Hope you have a fantastic rest of your day,
Ms Olivia
His answer back to me
I understand. It is my own issues that I have to deal with. Mainly out of frustration that this is the only outlet.
And they do let me keep the car overnight because I used to work for Ford…haha. But I get the analogy.
Like I said I am not arguing and I was not grumpy, just a little down on myself. You are certainly generous in e-mail responses where many mistresses don’t even respond to something as simple as “what is your schedule like?” or “when are you available for a session?”, lol. So I certainly do appreciate that you are willing to at least say hi and interact more than most. I can’t really have a high expectation when we have only done a couple of calls together.
Hope you have a good day also.
REALLY? You test drive a car and they let you keep it overnight or for the weekend? I have never heard of that but I’m so darn excited that he understands the analogy. And, I googled this and found, yes it is common to get an overnight test drive but I seriously doubt they let you take it for DAYS on end.
My answer back to him:
This (personal, private emails) isn’t the only outlet. But, it is the wrong outlet for lots of out of session interactions.
Might I suggest reddit.com …. there are several BDsm community threads there. I pop in there a lot when I have time. But there are LOTS of other people in there to have conversations with.
I like reddit more than places like fetlife but there ARE places to have these conversations. I’d love to hear about your experience with reddit if you choose to join.
Ms Olivia
Okay, rant over and back to the sexy.
Your Experienced Mistress,
Ms Olivia
I appreciate you writing about this subject, Ms Olivia. It is particularly helpful that you posted excerpts of the conversation that inspired this posting. Because this is a topic I have discussed with callers and potential callers many times over the years. We offer the best in phone sex entertainment, and like with all professional, elite services, one must expect to pay for that service. Like you, I am generous with my responses to blog comments, and to emails. For me, anything done in chat, beyond a few exchanges to set up a session…IS a session. This career is highly demanding as we have multiple blogs to write in between sessions, and it takes a lot of time to put together a quality posting. Yours are always thought provoking. I am sure this one will elicit a lot of discussion.
Thanks for posting Ms Violet! This actually isn’t getting much in the way of comments and I’m about to put up a new blog post. I know that LDW Group is unique in that we give LOTS of access and interaction before and between calls. The vast majority of people are really GREAT about respecting appropriate limits and boundaries …. but some really aren’t and I’m not sure why that is. I have seen unreasonable demands for out of session or unpaid time ‘BREAK’ a Mistress and she simply gets burned out on the business. That’s a shame because I love doing this so I manage my time/energy so I stay well rested, focused, sexy and creative.
Dear Unhappy Guy,
Read this post and your email. You seem like a decent dude and it’s not my intention to trash you. Full disclosure: my schedule does not allow for much phone sex. I purchase audios instead so as a LDW customer, I probably suck far worse than you do.
Still your email confused me and when I’m confused I always turn to the one who offers wisdom and guidance in troubled times:
Oprah.
She said this:
“Ask the right questions, and the answers will always reveal themselves.“
So here are my questions:
I’m confused about your concept of “sexual liberation” How does the term “sexual liberation” equate to you expecting women to talk to you about sex for free? I don’t really see women worldwide taking to the streets to celebrate this new found freedom. I could be wrong. Actually I hope and pray I’m wrong, but it seems unlikely.
What’s the deal with the money? You say you have “a bit” of money you don’t know what to do with. That could be millions of dollars or like me you occasionally find some spare change by the Taco Bell sauce packets in the seat cushions of your 1998 Honda Civic.
Whatever the amount, I’m guessing the one thing you did not do to acquire that wealth was to work for free. That would be called volunteering. A noble pursuit but not why one starts a business and that’s what LDW is, a business. I goggled and the number of pro bono phone sex operators I found was exactly zero.
Have you been around LDW long? The amount of free stuff LDW gives away is staggering; audios, emails, chat, blogs etc. If and when I do buy out Ms. Ally, the first change I will institute (besides Spank the Owner Friday) is NO More Giving Away The Milk. Unless the caller has some crazy lactation fetish but then it would still be $6.50 a minute. That’s right pal you’re buying the cow (no offense ladies) and the price just went up.
Have you experienced other companies? There’s a different company where the mistress charged for her email address. Not to email her, just for the address to email her. I just wanted to pay her to record an audio. So she missed out on $150 because she wanted $2.50. That Wharton School of Business graduate is no longer plying her trade.
In all seriousness, I have seen the women at LDW be incredibly kind and generous with their time with guys who probably didn’t have the means to pay for a lot of calls so it’s not just about the money for them. However if you have the means, always pay people for their services and expect nothing for free in return. It shows you respect their time and talents and will usually insure a great experience.
Best wishes on your fetish exploration.
Oh.
WOW.
THIS.
Okay, so I was sitting here (not logged in because I only have under an hour before I have to leave) and I’m creating more of the FREE STUFF and I was feeling exactly that …. like I’m giving the milk away for free. I could feel my energy begin to leak out as I go through emails like the one that inspired the blog post. ~sigh~ You know the one that fries my fanny is not really the one that can’t pay … but more the one who CAN but doesn’t because …. why? Sometimes he just likes playing the PSO, sometimes he wants a bargain, sometimes, who the hell knows. All this goes with the territory, that’s for sure, and I have different levels of tolerance … today I was feeling low energy until I read this blog comment and fucking HOWLED laughing! You know I have SUCH a crush on you, right? I do and can you even IMAGINE these long legs climbing into and out of that Honda Civic … I draw the line at sitting amongst taco bell sauce packets.