I thought my fetish desires were only about sex
Listen to my voice as I read you this sexy blog post.
If you think this same thing, then you are not alone.  I suspect that most people think of erotic pleasure as something “away” from “real life.”  The “separate” aspect often comes into play when someone is a sexual submissive but Alpha in other aspects of life.  I am often in the role of a sex therapist, so I think about these sorts of things.
This is one reason why we say it’s important to find your perfect Mistress.  As you can tell from my blog posts, I read, learn and think.  I’ll admit, I’m happy to be called a sexy nerd or geek!  So, here’s my latest interest.  Things that no one tells you at the beginning of your BDsm journey.
Learn about yourself with fetish play
Play parties and scenes all contribute to the “otherness” of kinky playtime. Â No matter how “separate” these aspects of yourself might appear … remember YOU are the common element. Â If you key into that and let the sensations flow over you, I guarantee you will learn about yourself.
Often the first insight will be why you like the kink that appeals to you. Â On the other hand, you might not know a reason — you just are curious about a kink. Â You might NEVER know the “why” of erotic pleasure.
Phone sex is perfect for exploration. Â This caller says it beautifully:
“Phone sex allows for fantasy activities that are tremendously erotic but that could be unsafe or unwise in-person. I wouldn’t want to jeopardize aspects of my personal life with indiscretions that others would not understand. Heck, I don’t even understand the counter-intuitive things that get my motor running. I’m perfectly happy to keep those things in the closet. Or, perhaps more accurately, in the panty drawer!!”
I know you want to share your fetish
Some of you have tried to talk to your partner about your kinky erotic needs. Â Sometimes this conversation works … sometimes it doesn’t. Â I can be a safe and sexy place to share and explore your kinky interests.
Your Experienced Mistress,
Ms Olivia
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This is a great post, Ms Olivia! I think being able to help our callers explore kinks they don’t or can’t realize in their real lives is one of the most rewarding parts of being a Mistress at LDW. I love being a sounding board and helping them meet their needs.
Yessssss !!!!!!!!!!!! Being a sounding board is well said Ms Rayne … that’s also part of it … because, for most people, any fetish or erotic exploration is just that … and EXPLORATION … that means some things will be fun fun fun and others only so so and still others, MEH or NO. All those reactions are just fine and perfect!
Ohhhhh sounds awesome petey cream puff!
Mistress,
I agree that kinky sex is often (always?) about more than just sex.
I have a thought about your Alpha male example: Balance. Perhaps a guy who plays the outward role of an Alpha male for practical reasons (such as family and business) isn’t actually wired that way. Maybe, down in the deeper recesses, his unconscious mind is working to balance the scales … and brilliantly using his primal sex drive to make it happen.
Um? Any similarity to real persons or events is purely coincidental …
John Q.
I love the phrase: “erotic vacation” … right?
I have many callers who consider phone sex a “safe” outlet for their fetishes. When they call us, they don’t have to worry about anyone coming out of the shadows to expose them, and they know they can trust us to be respectful (or not, depending on their particular kink!). Either way, they know we’re there for them when they need us. 🙂
YES YES YES …. safe, sane and consensual — and above all their “secrets” are very safe with us!