I get a lot of questions and one of the most common questions is from men who identify as heterosexual but worry about what their sexual desires “mean.” This blog is inspired by a straight man who wants cock. Since this is such a frequently asked question, I’m going to answer it here. First, you’re not alone. I’d bet you’d be surprised how many straight guys think about hard dicks. Second, sexual attraction doesn’t automatically “mean” anything. There are het men that want the cock but are not bi or gay. Finally, I’ll give a couple recommendations to help you reframe these desires and get you out of what sounds a bit like panic.
Heterosexual men think about cocks
This is the email that inspired this blog post:
“I cannot stop thinking about cocks….I get turned on by hard cocks and sometimes I masturbate 3 or 4 times a day. I have not sucked off some guy since 2009, I crave it sometimes. Geez what am I to do ?”
Research backs up my statement that a lot of men think about cocks. A decade ago, 2 neuroscientists examined the web as a way to see secret human behavior. The book is called A Billion Wicked Thoughts by Ogas and Gaddam. They found that cock was the most used search term on the interwebs!
I know from my own experience doing Femdom phone sex just how many straight men are cock curious. Many men wonder if the cock fantasy means they have to be gay. Nope. Don’t worry. Having a fantasy about sucking a cock doesn’t mean anything about your sexual identity. I know this from personal and professional experience.
Hard cocks are hot!
So, he likes hard cocks. No kidding! A lot of people find a penis fascinating and fun! I like looking at hard cocks. A good looking big fat dick is a thing of beauty. For many straight guys, the fascination ends with the organ itself and they have no interest in having anything to do with the male body attached to the cock. Ms Harper has really thoughtful points about the difference between gender identity, sexual attraction and emotional partnerships. Check out the PRIDE Month episode of the BDSM / Kink podcast that Ms Erika and I do. While you’re there check out all the episodes on The Weekly Hot Spot.
Cock sucking fantasies that won’t go away
If you keep fantasizing about sucking cocks, don’t panic but also don’t ignore these fantasies. I am the Experienced Mistress. That means I have, duh, experience in knowing what to do with all kinds of sexual desires that are complicated to experience in person. For some people, it will be finding the perfect fantasy to scratch that itch. For others, it will be a candid conversation about cock sucking and safety in real life. You have many options and I can help you with all of them.
What should he do?
I told him what I’m telling you. Don’t get all weird about it, lots of straight guys think about cock. Wanting to suck cock doesn’t automatically mean that you’re emotionally attracted to men. You might find that you are bi or gay but simply being cock curious or having cock sucking fantasies doesn’t say anything about your sexual preference or desires. Finally, let’s have a conversation to find out about your true sexual needs and I’ll help you figure out what is best for your life, lifestyle and erotic desires. By the way, I think cock sucking fantasies are hot so I’ll be more than merely helpful, I’ll be turned on as well!
Are you ready to explore?
Your Experienced Mistress,
Ms Olivia
The Split Attraction Model answers all his questions! Why would someone who identifies as straight want cock? Simple: he’s straight romantically, but at the very least bi-curious sexually. When you divide romantic attraction and sexual attraction you can have people who want the white picket fence and romance with a woman, but still crave cock sexually! They don’t want to date the man behind the cock, they just want a wild afternoon delight and to get off, and then go home to their wife or girlfriend.
It makes so much sense, I’m practically an evangelist for the Split Attraction Model!
YES! And I agree with you — the split attraction model is a way to reframe this in a way that is:
1. more ACCURATE
and
2. Not threatening to someone who is worried about “bad implications from labels” or something like that.
I always love reading your posts and have been a fan for a long time.
BTW…..I first saw your profile while on SuckPatrol 🤦
Awwww thank you 3D!
Mmmmmmm, are you ready to go on SUCK PATROL with me?
grins
Hi Ms O!
Fantastic blog, and you’ve answered some very important questions many straight guys have about their cock desires!
You also point out how we can help them find balance with their desires, and understand them and what it “means” to them!
I wonder tho, are there any readers out there who identify with your message and if so have they utilized our services to guide them on their journey?
Great question — I’m thinking of one person that we’ve talked about in our blogs and on our BDSM kink podcast, The Weekly Hot Spot. I bet you know who I mean? You got it right?
nods
YEP! I’m thinking of Michael the cum junkie! He NOW identifies as bi-sexual he loves cock, blow jobs and gay sex. For him the journey started because he called a Mistress here about his cum eating fantasy.
I had him do cum brushing for me and several years later … va va va voooooommmmm!
Yes!!! the awesome ladies of LDW, particularly Amber and Olivia, have guided me down every step of my journey. Going from being curious about eating my own cum to actually doing it. Then getting addicted to the taste of it which caused me to have to confront my long held and very suppressed homosexual desires. I was very afraid of the fact that I might be bisexual growing up and into adulthood. I grew up in a place where that simply wasn’t acceptable for a guy and was barely acceptable for a girl. I suppressed it so much I convinced myself that it wasn’t real. I think deep down I knew that I was but could NOT admit to myself let alone anyone else.
You wonderful ladies convinced me that I needed to suck cock and, once I did, I knew there was no going back. I loved it sooo much and I knew then that I am definitely bi. As mistress Olivia said I LOVE cock so fucking much!!! I suck cock a couple times a day, every single day and won’t give it up for anything. I, not only, have accepted my bisexuality but have completely embraced it (fallen in love with it). Although I certainly still engage in heterosexual activity it amounts to a rather small percentage compared to the homosexual activity, probably close to 90-10.
Another thing Mistress,
I need to thank you more for our recent call. I know I thanked you in general then but, I really have to thank you so much more for how long you had me hold my cum in my mouth. It was absolutely SUBLIME!!! On my own, I will usually hold it for a few minutes but, it is natural to want to swallow or spit out something that’s in our mouths. Most people don’t even hold very delicious food in their mouth for more than a minute. I was hoping you would give me a prolonged experience with that sperm on my tastebuds and boy did you ever. So awesome! I don’t know if you set a timer or just winged it. I’m guessing it was at least 10 minutes if not 15 or 20.
Holding it in my mouth for that long caused me to salivate quite a bit making the load feel much bigger than it actually was without significantly diluting the taste. Also, swishing it around for that long had a similar effect to cum brushing. It got into my gums and the after taste lingered for a long time. I avoided eating or drinking anything for about 3 hours. Until I finally did, the aftertaste was still noticeable. Thank you sooooooooo much!!! As long as we have enough time, I hope we can repeat that on every call from now on.
Love ya!
Michael
P.S. My numbers as of right now. day 215 – been fucked 49 times, given 502 blowjobs, and swallowed 1112 loads.
WOW WOW and WOW !
Michael, you are someone who really makes a difference in my life as well.
I’m tracking your suck-cesses right along with you!
Please keep posting your numbers — could you EVER imagine you would have this amazing, passionate, fulfilled (literally as well!) life? I know the answer … and the fact that you DO have such a great life is thrilling for me as well.
Olivia Olivia! I have new numbers to report!
767 BJ’s and 1685, making it 1686 today, and our yummy cum eater held it for 20 Minutes!
My mind is blown! 😘😘
WHATTTT ??????????
wow wow and wow !!!!!!!!!!!!
He’s amazing !
I wonder what the final tally will be!
Oh, Ms. Oliva and Ms. Erika! I had the BEST time with Michael this morning. I will give you more numbers! 802 blowjobs so far this year AND 1771 loads eaten. Also, he held and swished his cum load for 23 minutes!! SO HAPPY to update this.
Ohhhhhh thank you for the update!
I can’t wait to hear the end of year numbers —how many how MUCH cum!?!
I don’t think I am straight any more
not if I am going straight down on my knees and straight to pulling that dragon out of his thong and going straight into my mouth
Wow, very interesting perspectives from Ms. Olivia, Ms Erika and, Ms. Harper. Split Attraction Model . . . hmmm. Also, on some level, sucking cock seems like it would be a deeply submissive act for me. No, i’m not asking for that! 🙂
Oh sucking cock IS a deeply submissive act for many men … it’s taboo in a very distinct kind of way.
You ARE or should be pussy free panty boi so we both know that you ARE submissive to a Dominant woman …. hmmmmmmmm.
Goddess “O”:
What about us use to be Heterosexual Guys that now think about and love sucking cock all the time mistress? I just adore the thought of having an at least an eight (8) inch sausage logged in my throat. Yummy, yummy, yummy.
Jizzelle
Oh now that’s a great point Jizzelle. You know the saying:the only constant is change.
I think that’s often the case with erotic pleasure and certainly with many sexual fantasies.
I don’t think that hardwired sexual attraction is something that can be ‘changed’ though — so often the guys who thought they were heterosexual are either bi or fully gay.
What do you think?
Goddess “O”:
I don’t know about others but yes, now that I think about it I was Bi to begin with. However, now because I love ❤️ dressing in feminine things and worshiping men and there appendage I can say that I am definitely gay. Furthermore, I still would adore 🥰 being your twin (so, so gorgeous) becoming the woman 👩 of my dreams (a slut for men to use). Hugs 🤗 from sissy cock slut Jizzelle.
Yummy 😋
Now, I’m always curious about something (and each person is different) — when you are en femme with a guy — ie you ARE in female persona — would you straight? As in a heterosexual woman being attracted to a man?
You know me – I always want to more and find out nuances particular to the individual.
Oh and by the way I still want to exchange bodies with you like I said the other day. Looking as gorgeous as yourself makes me insanely jealous.
Jizzelle
~giggles~
You sure have the lingerie collection to do it … you have an amazing closet!
I’m het, and my cock can grow over 4 inches, but gets very small when flaccid. I’ve always felt a fetish of being dominated when in the locker rooms at gyms I go to because I’m nearly always the smallest there. I overheard one guy tell his girlfriend “he has a small dick” in the parking lot and she started giggling at me. I think sucking a cock so much larger than mine would be submissive and accepting of their dominance.
Oh that’s a great point – sucking cock can be an act of submission for a Dominant woman OR your own submission to a superior man….or even a combo of both.
Did you get hard when she laughed at your small penis?
Yes, I started to get hard and had to turn away quickly to avoid people seeing it. It could be interpreted as a disrespectful comment to some, but for some reason I got instantly hard.
Tell me more!
What got you instantly hard?
Great question: I am a senior manager and think of myself as confident and secure. I also don’t like to think of my penis as small (I never have), as it’s only 1.5 inches below average when hard. But the moment I was called out by the boyfriend (who was well endowed) and especially the girlfriend, it’s like a curtain dropped and I was complete vulnerable and even felt submissive. I got hard instantly and I had to turn away as it started poking out of my sweats.
I’ve had a number of other moments like this over the past years, especially during my travel, and every time it leads me to get hard, have to leave and often Jack off.
There was a bar in Hong Kong where the ladies stroke my cock when I buy more drinks, and they kept giggling and saying something in Thai to the “mama Cita”, who later surprised me and wrapped her arms around me from behind and felt my cock. She then yelled something in Thai, and they all laughed. I asked one of the girls what she said, and she translated “Mama say little one stay home”.
There was the time in gym showers where two well-hung athletes looked at me and started grinning, one of them appeared to have a whole sponge and wash kit just to clean his huge penis, and he started stroking the sponge on his penis and looking at me directly with a big grin (I had to go straight to the rest room and Jack off), and multiple times at hotel pools where my trunks get wrapped around my penis, making it poke out.
At a Beijing hotel one lady looked, started laughing and pointed it out to her boyfriend, and I heard her say “he has a small dick!”.
My best friend’s wife also giggles and stares at it every time we swim together.
Finally, I had a bizarre experience at a German hotel a few years ago where the maid walked in while I was showering (no curtain, just a small glass partition), and she walked right up to me and started making conversation, while I was completely nude. Over the next several days I swear it felt like the other hotel staff were crotch watching me and giggling.
I like to Sauna, and it was great to sauna with such beautiful German women (all mixed sauna and all nude), and a few of them looked at me and said things in German and giggled, and I began to get embarrassed and then started getting hard and had to leave with them giggling more Sorry to run on, but I guess I get hard because it’s unusual for me to feel so vulnerable and not in control, and having women find it amusing. I still think it’s not very small when erect, but the feeling I can’t do anything about how small it gets flaccid and people looking and being amused is strangely and intstantly able to make me hard.
You’re not alone in really appreciating the combination of embarrassment, humiliation and extreme arousal. That’s the trifecta of small penis humiliation!
Thanks for sharing all those stories.
Elbert story is amazing also extremely humiliating for him . My penis maxed out at 5 1/2 hard Mr. Softie was 4 now almost an innie any how . Such a humiliated experience and your reaction? Me in similar situations pretending not to hear ignoring it all . Later in life in a hot tub situation with women present a comment was made of my small member and I called in a soft voice the big bull a meat gazer. He heard it and got 😡 angry and wanted to fight me at almost 150 lbs lighter weight and a foot and half shorter and I managed to get out of it with a fib and a very loud manly voice
Oh yikes!
I shrink under humiliation
Goddess “O”:
Now I don’t know about how a woman 👩 feels or thinks towards a man she feels something for I do have a feeling of being female especially when in feminine mode and dress. Wish every day that I was born a female. It just fits me better than a male (yuck). I adore 🥰 being a girl and being treated as one (yes, yes, yes).
Jizzy, I think of you as a woman … well, in all fairness I also think of you as a sissy slut!
LOL
But, not slut shaming from me girlfriend! I self identify as a pervert, slut and such as well!
tee hee
love this post Ms Olivia love all the girlie talk so hot n fun thanks !! xoxos
Thank you so much viola! Do you also listen to The Weekly Hot Spot podcast that I do with Ms Erika? It’s BDSM, kink, fetish, feminization, sissy training and so much more!
Are you a podcast fan?
Sometimes I may be straight
But when I can’t have a woman 👠♀️👠👠👠♀️👠♀️👠
Because of the micro penis
I then resort to the sissy side of life locked in chastity or the FU FU clip
and the new chastity device on order The Eunuch.
No I don’t want cock when I am in straight guy mode
But when sissy faggot mode takes over yes give me that shaved circumcised DICK !!!!
What a great comment April — this is very common, especially with my sissy friends.
Now Olivia the man in the photo. I f he was to hold his cock like that at the gay beach it would be a signal that he wants a blow job or might even give a blow job in return
Some submissive sissies only want to GIVE the blow job.
Are you saying you want to GET one?
I would definitely like to give him a blow job wow😜😜😜 if he wanted to blow me ok I suppose it does happen. But when I am in chastity I suck only
Oh now that makes sense – you should stay in chastity.
I only get out of chastity if I have to do physical work. I just love chastity why did wait so long ? I have had a tiny dicklet for ever why haven’t women exploited my weakness and put me in chastity for my own good?
I would rather suck his dick than he suck mine but if he does return favor it’s all good
Oh interesting!
Thank you.
I know there are some sissies who do NOT want to be on the receiving end.
Retuning the favor is a nice way of saying Thank you. There is a woman I know who I am just dying to tell her I want to return the favor
Ohhhhh tell me more.
I haven’t seen her around lately but I may ask about her. Returning the favor is a nice way of saying Thank you. If I get sucked by a man at the beach ⛱️ next time I will suck him back
I have not yet but it sounds awesome maybe ill try checking it out Im not that experienced with technology etc but ill definitely look into it for sure ty Ms Olivia your so beautiful and nice !! xoxos
Awww, thank you sweetie! If you have trouble finding it just send me an email and I’ll see if I can help!
Ms Olivia, I’d sure as heck like cock. Specifically one of my own! You’ve seen what I’ve been saddled with!🤣🤏
After that I’ll decide if I want someone else’s!
hahahahahahahha
I have seen that little clitty of yours lil peg — and that lovely pink cage !
you’re story about “bursting forth” is still giving me a chuckle!
Hi Little Peg, May I ask how big your cock is? Mine is 4 inches erect and I don’t think that’s small, but I can’t control how small it gets when flaccid, and it’s been a journey coming to grips with that.
Thanks for posting and sharing!
Elbert
Wait.
WHAT????
You don’t think 4 inches hard is small?
erm
Ms. O, I understand that 4 inches hard is below average size for sure. Anything less is getting towards the “very small” metric. But I still think it’s just big enough to appear near-average. I’ve been with a few women who were very tight and I think very satisfied with it. Admittedly, I’ve had two ex’s who were more slack in that area and let me know how much bigger their former boyfriends had been. So I feel I’m “nearly” in the middle. I’m curious what your thoughts are on that.
Hmmmmmm ….well I have a lot of thoughts on penis size.
Do you know how to search on the blog?
Here are lots of posts about small penis, sph, pink dick, etc.
Take a look and see if you can find some.
If you need more help – leave another comment and I can post links here.
Ms. Olivia,
Today I have reviewed many, many of your blogs on your ideas about penis size and SPH as you instructed.
As a result:
1. My underwear looks like I painted a map of the world on them with Jizz, I will have to change them as they are near drenched. All this while sitting at my desk unable to get up.
2. I realize I could never please you as you indicated you have a 7-inch minimum (citing your 2015 blog), and the fact I can never fill the 3 inch gap between your preference and my size is deeply frustrating and yet more erotic the more I read your posts about penis size.
3. In my mind, I do not want to admit defeat; isn’t there some way I could (hypothetically) satisfy you with my 4-inch cock?
4. For some reason, this is the most erotic thing I have ever felt and I am in awe of the sexual and dominant power you possess.
5. I’m hard again as I write this, refer again to point #1. This is a frustrating process but I’ve never felt this much pleasure from being this frustrated and embarrassed for my shortcomings before.
Respectfully,
Elbert
Hmmmm ….. thank you so much and I’m glad you are …. ahem ….. ENJOYING the blogs on penis size.
Now …. you wrote:
3. In my mind, I do not want to admit defeat; isn’t there some way I could (hypothetically) satisfy you with my 4-inch cock?
So …. to answer THAT question directly why YES there are many ways someone with a 4 inch cock can satisfy me. MANY ways. But one way in particular that you can NOT satisfy me.
Wash that underwear!
LOL
Olivia that’s a nice DIc
LOL. you’re right … that’s a really good looking penis!
That is a lot more than a penis That’s a Dick and a half.
LOL — a BIG cock that’s for sure!
That’s more than a mere penis That’s a DICK! MAYBE EVEN A DICK AND A HALF. MAJOR LEAGUE COCK!!?
Hi Ms. Olivia, I did a lot of reviewing of your posts on penis size, I clearly would not measure up to your expectations..From some research on penis sizes, it would appear I’m in the 5th percentile..that is much smaller than I would have thought. Somehow knowing your preference for big cocks and mine being significantly smaller is both frustrating and makes me hard every time I think about it. By the way, I just looked at your new pics, you are breathtaking! It makes it even more hard to know I don’t measure up to your preferences! Thank you for sharing your beautiful pics with us.
Elbert
Ohhhhhh you’re in the 5th percentile in penis size.
I LOVE men in the 5th percentile ….. oh WAIT you mean the BOTTOM 5th!
giggles
Well then …. sigh.
Now I have to wash my underwear again..
Oh my get busy!
4 inches hard is small
I was 5 1/2 hard
before gender bending crossdressing sissificitation. chastity and feminization herbals & food soy products which Miss Hunter encouraged me to do for penis shrinkage
Yes, you are small and Ms Hunter knows exactly what to do with a sissy (especially one who wants to shrink her clitty).
Yes Olivia Miss Hunter encouraged me to shrink my clitty to almost nothing along with Misstress Brittany.
Misstress Hunter told me about soy products for feminization My leg hair and clitty hair grow less and my skin is softer drinking soy milk all the time
Soy milk is awesome!
Yes for feminization and it’s also super healthy in general.
I actually show off how small I am. Probably got kicked off Twitter Facebook and Reddit
now it’s just panties on the beach
LOL
yep you’ve got to be careful – I always tell people don’t involved “civilians” without their consent – no matter how tempting.
Fucking Huge compared to me /mine now because of the flat chastity device. Can’t even find it in a hurry to pee when stalls are full and some clown 🤡 is sitting on the bowl looking at Internet porn
hahahahaha
I’m a Mistress who will send someone into the stall to look at porn, call me and jerk off so I might be inadvertently causing issues for the chastity pets!
Oh Oh Oh Olivia you are so naughty. Just thinking about the naughty fun we could be having in Florida on a beach or elsewhere while you are ❄️🌨️ snowed under
Olivia,
I loved reading Michael’s response. Good for you, Michael! Be your best self! I, like you, had some encouragement from the LDW ladies. They helped me to come to a lot of the same realizations that you did. The one difference, is that I am not bi. I’m 100% gay and LOVING life! Here’s to sucking delicious, yummy cocks and loving men!
If this is who I think it is then YESSSSS you are 100% gay and I love that you know that about yourself!
Hmmmmmmm, describe a yummy cock that you’ve sucked recently …. ’cause I know you have very good taste in dicks!
grins
Miss Olivia am I 💯 percent gay if perform oral on a woman on demand?🤔I like a smooth circumcized cock in a g string . But I have been exposed to some hairy ones that given the opportunity I might suck . I prefer the bald eagle 🦅 on a woman but a landing strip is nice also a mink coat or a sexy silver fox 🤪😜
Hmmmmm that’s an interesting question –
are you 100% gay if you eat pussy …. let me think about that and that question might end up being a blog post!
Dicks are sweet. I sucked a dick today a little girth shorter but bigger than mine
YAY for the cock sucking sissy!
I love female cheer leaders especially after sucking KKuoook
Cheerleader is the most popular of all the slutty types of costumes for Halloween.
iiiiiim just a sissy who needs cock oooooooh
laughs and are you a good cock sucking sissy? Hmmmmm? Are you?
Misstress Olivia the photo of the well hung man
That is the signal at the beach to get some action if I respond the same way or flash my clitty it off to thd woods for some action
There are all sorts of cues to let people know — hey I’m a cocksucker!
Good sissy!
How do you let a man know of your sexual sucking desire? Do women send signals to a man if they want to suck his dick?
Hmmmm …. tell me more about what you’re asking.
Women don’t tend to want to suck random dicks – it’s more of a “I like you and therefore I want to suck your dick” type of thing so there is already a relationship there.
no one ever said that to me ” I like you therefore I want to suck your dick”I wonder why?🤔 Maybe I should say that to men?
Oh Olivia I have heard one or two but if you know of more please dear Misstress spit it out( the clues) only tell me. One other clue is wearing a Mickey Mouse watch or a Mickey Mouse t shirt when not near Disney world.
Other was wearing a plaid shirt but not a flannel shirt
LOL